Thursday, October 18, 2007

I am beginning to come to terms with the fact that I am the one who is most UN-ready to potty train. I have been agonizing and debating and weighing and observing and trying desperately to discern Violet’s level of awareness and readiness. I have always solved problems with research. I have now researched myself into a full-blown tizzy! I am teary, tired and tense. I AM NOT READY. I have decided to stop potty training until I am ready. This is a tremendous relief to me. I feel the growing ulcer beginning to subside already. Violet may be on the verge of being coercible, but I am not emotionally prepared to do any coercing. I gave a piece of advice to a friend the other day that I will now take the time to follow. Making a change needs to be less painful than maintaining the status quo (at least as far as potty training and sleep arrangements go). When cleaning up pee and constant vigilance to pre-potty body language no longer drive me to drink, I will try again. I will embrace the lazy alternative that is delayed potty training. I have been practicing diaper change smiles for so long that it would be a shame to exchange them for exasperated sighs and frowns so soon. *And yes, Violet is wearing my underpants on her head in this photo.

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