Thursday, January 31, 2008

An Open Letter to the Writer's Guild

Uncle! You win. I (and everyone I know who watches too much TV) am officially miserable. I have had about as much as I can take of reality. I feel like I am at a circa 1989 slumber party every time I see an ad for that broadcast abomination "American Gladiator". The last time you staged a major writer's strike, "COPS" was born. Do you want that kind of legacy on your conscience? The American people are desperate for entertainment and if you aren't careful, you will destroy the audience. Too much reality can only lead to brain damage. With so many morons and wanna be celebrities out there willing to risk all of their dignity for 15 minutes of fame, the networks will never run out of material. Do you see? The economy is in the toilet, the networks have an inexhaustible supply of camera ready idiots-- the scripts write themselves. The madness has to stop! Someone needs to put on their big writer panties and reach a compromise. I sympathize with all of your concerns. I know that you deserve more. Listen to me. Your absence has impacted my life dramatically. Go back to the table and start the smart writing. People are losing valuable brain cells in viewer land. "The Moment of Truth" is here. Seriously, have seen this show. They are broadcasting vicious slumber party games on television. It's insane. I want to go back to watching THE Daily Show, rather than A Daily Show. I want to feel smart again.

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